We're in Ventura for the weekend visiting Dan's parents one last time before the baby comes. Gary, Dan's dad, is afraid I'm going to pop while we're here. I keep telling him, Nah, no chance...but then again I have noticed a slight increase in mild pressure waves ("contractions" for all you non-hypnobabies folks)...
I brought my pregnancy photos and album when we came up here because Abby always ends up running off with Greena to play dress-up with all Greena's jewelry, and since we're not home I don't have to worry about the dishes in the sink or the messy living room or the laundry that still hasn't been folded from the beginning of the week. So when she pulled Greena off to the bedroom--in about three minutes flat after walking through the door--I pulled out my materials and started to work.
I've had the album and coordinated papers and photos all ready and waiting for ages. It's just been one of those projects that I was afraid to undertake because I thought it would take me hours and hours to complete. I couldn't get the inertia going. But I figured I'd be happy if I could at least get the pages and photos laid out; I could always come back to it to finish the journaling.
But here it is, not even 10 PM on the first day we're here, and the album is complete. Laid out, taped down, journaled and everything. I'm stunned! Why do things always seems like they're going to take longer than they actually do? If I'd known I could whip through it this fast I'd have done it ages ago.
'Course as I was doing the page for week 36, it dawned on me that there was only one pregnancy picture left to be taken--the one from the day I actually go into labor. And then I realized, oh my heavens, in four days I will be 38 weeks along. THIRTY-EIGHT WEEKS. That's officially full term, folks. And then I thought, Oh crap.
Another baby.
Midnight (and 2 AM and 4 AM and 6 AM) feedings.
Sibling rivalry.
Labor.
Actually having a natural birth.
It's this last one that's really getting me. I have no doubt that I'm going to end up with my VBAC, which makes me really happy on the one hand, and completely scares the you-know-what outta me on the other. I know I'm prepared, I know I can do it, but that whole fear-of-the-unknown thing is really starting to get to me.
So I'd like to ask for your prayers. Pray I don't freak out. Pray my hypnobabies practice pays off. Pray nothing happens that necessitates a transfer to the hospital. Pray it's a textbook delivery that takes less than, say, 18 hours. And pray that, between now and then, I'm able to maintain the peace I've felt for the majority of the pregnancy. It would suck to start to lose it now.
Friday, February 29, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
The Home Visit!
Today Michelle the Super Midwife and her trusty sidekick Carly came to the house for our home visit. Sheridan, doula and hypnobabies instructor extrordinaire, was also on hand, as was my wonderful Abby-entertaining mother. I have the best birth team ever!
I almost cried in the middle of the meeting, it was just so cool. Show me an OB who has ever said, "Okay, so tell me what role you'd like me to play in your birth. Tell me what your expectations are, what you'd like the experience to be like. How can we help you have the birth you want to have?" I almost didn't know what to say in response; I wasn't expecting to be the one in charge of everything. I thought Michelle would say, "So here's what we do, here's what to expect once we get here," etc.--and I would have been totally and completely cool with that, because I trust her to do only that which is absolutely necessary and to be pretty hands off otherwise, that's just what her approach is. But to be handed the reins and told that she trusts me to know best what I need was so empowering. It gave me that much more confidence that this birth would be what I wanted it to be.
After I told everyone what I expected of them (which felt really weird, I have to say; I didn't want to sound demanding or bossy or something!), Michelle went over the whole "when to call us" thing, and then we did my prenatal exam, which is pretty low-key--blood pressure, baby's heartbeat (in the 140s), fundal measurement and checking the baby's position. S/he is still head down, thank you God!! S/he flipped to the right side, which is fine, and s/he has really been pushing that little tush and feet out. At one point it looked like something was going to pop right through, a little foot, I'm guessing. Very weird. But I know from experience that, regardless of how eager I am to have him/her in my arms, I'm going to miss the kicks and rolls and stretches inside.
Mom, Dan, Abby, and I went to dinner afterwards, and I was just so jazzed. All I could think about was going into labor. The home visit really made me feel like everything was official, like the baby was cleared to come any time s/he was ready, and I--
--oh hey, contraction, I think!--
kept saying, "I'm just so excited! I can't wait!"
Sheridan loaned me a DVD of a bunch of hypnobabies births to watch. They were SO cool. Hers was on there, too, and it made me cry it was so great. It was really encouraging to see it in practice. I'm going to be getting together with Tina, my hypnobirthing instructor from Abby's birth, to watch a bunch of hypnobirth births, too. Even though the approach is different, the end result is the same: mothers who are ultra-relaxed, births that are calm and peaceful and beautiful to watch. I want to fill my head with as many of these positive birth stories and images as possible.
I have to be honest, though, and admit that I'm getting a little nervous about the whole pushing-the-baby-out part of the birth. Labor doesn't bother me--I've done that already and it went great, and I have no reason to think it won't go great this time around, either. I haven't gone through transformation (hypnobabies-speak for transition) so I'm a bit apprehensive about what that will be like. I know it's really intense for some women, but I think hypno-moms tend to have less dramatic ones because their system is so relaxed. It's just fear of the unknown, really. But the pushing bit is the part that has me a little more nervous. When I make myself analyze what exactly bothers me, I realize that it's just the idea of it, more than any specific facet of the process. And once I remind myself that a bazillion women have done this before me, most of the nerves dissipate, so I just need to focus on that and stop letting the concept of it all overwhelm me.
So tomorrow I'm 37 weeks--we're in the home stretch! We've been talking a little more with Abby about the baby. Michelle suggested not only getting a gift for Abby from the baby, but a gift FROM Abby FOR the baby as well. I mentioned it to her tonight when she commented on the co-sleeper and how it was where the baby would take a nap, and she said, "Present for Mommy, too!" Such a sweetie. :) Anyway, I think I may take her to Target this week and let her pick out something and help her wrap it and everything. Maybe store it in the co-sleeper. As far as what to get Abby, we'd talked about getting her a new baby doll and some baby gear--a stroller, a bassinet, etc.--but never officially decided on that. I need to talk to Dan some more and see if he has any other thoughts. Seeing how much she loves her trains, getting her another GeoTrax set would probably be just as welcome, if not more so. But she does exhibit some great maternal instincts, and I'd love to nurture that.
Tomorrow I go to Burke Williams Day Spa for a maternity milk bath and an EIGHTY MINUTE massage. Just the thought makes me go limp. Yesterday I got my nails done; now I just have to keep them up so they're pretty in the pictures of me holding the new baby. The house gets spring cleaned by Merry Maids on the 5th. Tomorrow the electrician puts in a new ceiling fan in the bedroom, among other things. And then sometime in the next three weeks we'll have a new baby. :)
Me at 36 weeks!
I almost cried in the middle of the meeting, it was just so cool. Show me an OB who has ever said, "Okay, so tell me what role you'd like me to play in your birth. Tell me what your expectations are, what you'd like the experience to be like. How can we help you have the birth you want to have?" I almost didn't know what to say in response; I wasn't expecting to be the one in charge of everything. I thought Michelle would say, "So here's what we do, here's what to expect once we get here," etc.--and I would have been totally and completely cool with that, because I trust her to do only that which is absolutely necessary and to be pretty hands off otherwise, that's just what her approach is. But to be handed the reins and told that she trusts me to know best what I need was so empowering. It gave me that much more confidence that this birth would be what I wanted it to be.
After I told everyone what I expected of them (which felt really weird, I have to say; I didn't want to sound demanding or bossy or something!), Michelle went over the whole "when to call us" thing, and then we did my prenatal exam, which is pretty low-key--blood pressure, baby's heartbeat (in the 140s), fundal measurement and checking the baby's position. S/he is still head down, thank you God!! S/he flipped to the right side, which is fine, and s/he has really been pushing that little tush and feet out. At one point it looked like something was going to pop right through, a little foot, I'm guessing. Very weird. But I know from experience that, regardless of how eager I am to have him/her in my arms, I'm going to miss the kicks and rolls and stretches inside.
Mom, Dan, Abby, and I went to dinner afterwards, and I was just so jazzed. All I could think about was going into labor. The home visit really made me feel like everything was official, like the baby was cleared to come any time s/he was ready, and I--
--oh hey, contraction, I think!--
kept saying, "I'm just so excited! I can't wait!"
Sheridan loaned me a DVD of a bunch of hypnobabies births to watch. They were SO cool. Hers was on there, too, and it made me cry it was so great. It was really encouraging to see it in practice. I'm going to be getting together with Tina, my hypnobirthing instructor from Abby's birth, to watch a bunch of hypnobirth births, too. Even though the approach is different, the end result is the same: mothers who are ultra-relaxed, births that are calm and peaceful and beautiful to watch. I want to fill my head with as many of these positive birth stories and images as possible.
I have to be honest, though, and admit that I'm getting a little nervous about the whole pushing-the-baby-out part of the birth. Labor doesn't bother me--I've done that already and it went great, and I have no reason to think it won't go great this time around, either. I haven't gone through transformation (hypnobabies-speak for transition) so I'm a bit apprehensive about what that will be like. I know it's really intense for some women, but I think hypno-moms tend to have less dramatic ones because their system is so relaxed. It's just fear of the unknown, really. But the pushing bit is the part that has me a little more nervous. When I make myself analyze what exactly bothers me, I realize that it's just the idea of it, more than any specific facet of the process. And once I remind myself that a bazillion women have done this before me, most of the nerves dissipate, so I just need to focus on that and stop letting the concept of it all overwhelm me.
So tomorrow I'm 37 weeks--we're in the home stretch! We've been talking a little more with Abby about the baby. Michelle suggested not only getting a gift for Abby from the baby, but a gift FROM Abby FOR the baby as well. I mentioned it to her tonight when she commented on the co-sleeper and how it was where the baby would take a nap, and she said, "Present for Mommy, too!" Such a sweetie. :) Anyway, I think I may take her to Target this week and let her pick out something and help her wrap it and everything. Maybe store it in the co-sleeper. As far as what to get Abby, we'd talked about getting her a new baby doll and some baby gear--a stroller, a bassinet, etc.--but never officially decided on that. I need to talk to Dan some more and see if he has any other thoughts. Seeing how much she loves her trains, getting her another GeoTrax set would probably be just as welcome, if not more so. But she does exhibit some great maternal instincts, and I'd love to nurture that.
Tomorrow I go to Burke Williams Day Spa for a maternity milk bath and an EIGHTY MINUTE massage. Just the thought makes me go limp. Yesterday I got my nails done; now I just have to keep them up so they're pretty in the pictures of me holding the new baby. The house gets spring cleaned by Merry Maids on the 5th. Tomorrow the electrician puts in a new ceiling fan in the bedroom, among other things. And then sometime in the next three weeks we'll have a new baby. :)
Me at 36 weeks!
Sunday, February 24, 2008
24 hours left to vote!
If you haven't done it yet, get off yer duff and do it: the polls are almost closed for the "Guess the Baby's Stats" contest. Click here to read the hints and then leave a comment with your prediction. Remember there are books to be won! No more guesses will be taken as of Tuesday morning, so do it now!
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
35 weeks!
Unbelievable--in one week I will be technically full term! Woohoo!!!
Today I had a midwife appointment. I love Michelle, I really do. She's such a sweet person. And I really loved her today because she assured me that the baby has flipped out of breech and is officially head down and in the "optimal fetal position"! What a huge relief. Though now I'm stressing about keeping the baby that way, since it has yet to descend into the pelvis and could thus flip right around again if its little heart desired. I've been having some very serious talks with it the last couple weeks, so it knows how important it is to stay put, but you know how kids are. Any suggestions for encouraging descent are welcome!
My next appointment with Michelle will actually take place here at the house during the home visit. By then I have to have all my birth stuff purchased and organized. I have most of it, but there are still some random things that we have around the house (receiving blankets, socks for both baby and me, etc.) that need to be rounded up. Once I get everything laid out nicely I'll take a picture so you can see how little is really needed for a home birth!
The one lousy part of my appointment today was weighing myself and discovering I'd gained FIVE POUNDS since my last appointment two weeks ago. Egads. I kept sliding that stupid little weight over the bar thinking, "No, it's not possible, I can't have gained this much." But apparently I did. So that sucks. And it's not like I've been eating like a madwoman or doing nothing but carbs--though I guess maybe I've been a little carb heavy, but not THAT carb heavy! This is the same rate at which I gained weight with Abby. I'm basically at 40 pounds gained right now; I was hoping that would be it for the whole pregnancy. *pout*
My nesting urges have been slowly kicking in, meaning I actually notice when the house is a mess now. SO MUCH HAS TO BE DONE! Everywhere I turn there's another mess, and it's driving me batty. I really need to clean out Abby's closet so we have a place for all the new baby's clothes. I really need to get my office straightened out since that will probably be a sort of "staging" area for birth supplies and such. I really need to get the last wall of the bedroom painted and all the extra furniture moved out so we have room for me and Dan and the doula and Michelle and her assistant(s?). Plus the whole house needs to be picked up so we can get a cleaning service in and a carpet cleaning service in. Can you say 'overwhelmed'?
Today I had a midwife appointment. I love Michelle, I really do. She's such a sweet person. And I really loved her today because she assured me that the baby has flipped out of breech and is officially head down and in the "optimal fetal position"! What a huge relief. Though now I'm stressing about keeping the baby that way, since it has yet to descend into the pelvis and could thus flip right around again if its little heart desired. I've been having some very serious talks with it the last couple weeks, so it knows how important it is to stay put, but you know how kids are. Any suggestions for encouraging descent are welcome!
My next appointment with Michelle will actually take place here at the house during the home visit. By then I have to have all my birth stuff purchased and organized. I have most of it, but there are still some random things that we have around the house (receiving blankets, socks for both baby and me, etc.) that need to be rounded up. Once I get everything laid out nicely I'll take a picture so you can see how little is really needed for a home birth!
The one lousy part of my appointment today was weighing myself and discovering I'd gained FIVE POUNDS since my last appointment two weeks ago. Egads. I kept sliding that stupid little weight over the bar thinking, "No, it's not possible, I can't have gained this much." But apparently I did. So that sucks. And it's not like I've been eating like a madwoman or doing nothing but carbs--though I guess maybe I've been a little carb heavy, but not THAT carb heavy! This is the same rate at which I gained weight with Abby. I'm basically at 40 pounds gained right now; I was hoping that would be it for the whole pregnancy. *pout*
My nesting urges have been slowly kicking in, meaning I actually notice when the house is a mess now. SO MUCH HAS TO BE DONE! Everywhere I turn there's another mess, and it's driving me batty. I really need to clean out Abby's closet so we have a place for all the new baby's clothes. I really need to get my office straightened out since that will probably be a sort of "staging" area for birth supplies and such. I really need to get the last wall of the bedroom painted and all the extra furniture moved out so we have room for me and Dan and the doula and Michelle and her assistant(s?). Plus the whole house needs to be picked up so we can get a cleaning service in and a carpet cleaning service in. Can you say 'overwhelmed'?
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