SHE'S HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!

There aren't enough exclamation marks in the world to convey my utter shock and elation at a) having another daughter (especially when we were SO sure it was going to be a boy) and b) getting my VBAC at home with no complications whatsoever. It still hasn't sunk in. Maybe writing everything out here will hammer it home.

I woke up a little after 3 this morning with a contraction. I didn't think much of it because that's been happening a lot lately. But then another one came 13 minutes later, and the next one 5 minutes later. "Oh, that's gotta be a fluke," I thought. But the next one was also 5 minutes later, and they were all pretty strong, so I decided to get up and see what might happen.

They were consistently 5 minutes apart for about an hour, and getting quite intense. Suddenly I had two right on top of each other that really bowled me over, and I realized I needed to get Dan up, have him call my mom, and call Sheridan, my doula. I called the doula first so she could start heading over--and she had just gotten home an hour before from another birth! She asked if I would be alright with her catching a quick nap and coming over in a couple hours, and I said sure, figuring we still had quite a bit of time ahead of us for this birth. But then I had two contractions just going from Dan's office to the bedroom to wake him up, and I knew that things were starting to pick up speed. We called the midwife, and then a contraction hit that made me want to push, and I just about panicked thinking the baby was going to be born right then! Then Sheridan called and said "You know what, I feel like I need to come over," and I was like, "Yeah you do!" When she got there I was still feeling pushy with my contractions, and I yelled to Dan to get some of the chux pads from the birth kit and lay them on the floor because I honestly thought I was going to have the baby in the next 5 minutes. Instead (and thankfully!) it was just my water breaking.

I labored on the floor in Dan's office for quite a while, because I just couldn't bear the thought of moving all the way down the hall to the bedroom; it just seemed too monumental a task. (It also took a while to get the bed prepped; we needed to wait for my mom to come, and then we moved Abby downstairs to the sofa bed and Dan got the birthing sheets and plastic mattress protector all set up.) I'll have to find out the exact time of this, but at one point I felt like I was totally done, mentally and physically. Because everything had hit so fast, I'd never had time to get going with my hypnobabies stuff, and I felt EVERYTHING! So I asked Michelle to check me to see how far I was. She put me off for a while because my water had broken, and the risk of infection goes up once that happens, but then a little while later I absolutely HAD to know. I had 8 cm in my head as a benchmark; I felt like, if I was at least that far, I could handle it, but if I was any less, I was seriously going to ask for a hospital transfer and get an epidural. It was THAT intense. (Though how I thought I'd be able to get downstairs and endure a ride to the hospital when I couldn't bear the thought of moving 12 feet down the hall, I don't know!) So then she checked me and, lo and behold, I was indeed an 8! She said if I wanted to push a little to go ahead and do it, it might get me the rest of the way to 10. It was SUCH a relief to have a physical outlet (besides the roaring and growling I'd been doing) when the contractions hit!

Eventually I knew I wanted to get into the bedroom, but I was so tired and weak it took two people supporting me to even get me moving. (My last meal had been at 5 the night before, and I'd had nothing besides sips of Recharge during contractions since Michelle had gotten there, around 5:30.) Finally they got me up and into the bathroom for a pit stop, and then into the bedroom on the birthing stool. I kept yelling at the baby, "Come on, crown! Get moving!" I kept asking if they could see anything, and Michelle would just say she could feel the head but not see it, and that it might still be awhile. I remember thinking, "I don't think I have 'awhile' left in me! It better be faster than that!"

Then something shifted in me and I wanted to get up on the bed. They helped me crawl up there, and I was on all fours, hugging the birthing ball (which is how I'd labored most of the time in Dan's office) and holding Dan's hand in an "arm wrestling" grip to use as a brace. I'm not sure how long I was up there, but then with one of the contractions I could feel that she was just right there, and I thought, "If I don't push that head out right now, I'm never going to make it." I didn't think I had the energy to do it, but I did, and everyone cheered and I just kept saying, "I'm doing it! I'm doing it!" The next contraction felt too weak to get the rest of her out, but I couldn't bear to do it any longer, so I gave it everything I had left in me and out she came!

She squeaked out a tiny cry, and they put her on my back while I caught my breath. It took Dan a few seconds to get a good look at the sex, and when he said it was a girl I about fell off the bed! EVERYONE thought it would be a boy! They helped me maneuver onto my back to lie down, and the placenta came out pretty quickly, probably less than 10 minutes after PJ.

I'm kinda fuzzy on things after that. I was shaking uncontrollably, apparently a common post-birth experience, and I was just SO incredibly weak and tired. After a little while they made me get up to go to the bathroom, and then I took a shower to get cleaned up but nearly fainted when I was done. I ended up kneeling on the floor of the tub and calling for someone to come help me; they brought Recharge and toast and made me eat, which made me feel a tiny bit better. Mom had made sandwiches and scrambled eggs for everyone, so when I got back into the bed (with my hair still uncombed from the shower!) I had a little more to eat and it totally helped. PJ was cleaned and dressed and all her measurements taken while I was in the shower; they brought her over to nurse and she latched almost right away and ate for probably 5 or 6 minutes. Oh, and somewhere in there--after the shower, I think, but before Mom brought up the food--they spent 45 minutes stitching me up because I tore in all sorts of lovely places. PJ came out with her hand next to her face, and given how hard and fast I pushed out her 14 and 1/8 inches-sized head (plus hand), there was no time for anything to stretch. So that sucks. But oh well.

So five hours of labor almost to the minute, with 44 minutes of pushing. Not bad for a first timer!

And I think she's going to look like me! She definitely has my coloring, whereas Abby has Dan's olive tone. And mom kept saying yesterday, "That's what you looked like when you were born, I swear." 'Course they all said that about Abby, too, the first couple days--and then suddenly she turned into mini-Dan. So we'll see.

Our first night went surprisingly well. Abby didn't go to sleep until almost 10:30, but she slept through the entire night until after 8. Penny-J slept all night, too, except for an hour long nursing session from about 12:30-1:30--her first meal since the one after she was born! And when she woke up this morning she ate a little and was quite alert--she even sat on Abby's lap for the first time. Very cute--tried to get a picture but the bedroom was too dark. Oh well--plenty of opportunities for that will come.

I'm sure I'll remember more as the days go on, so I'll post more details as they surface. Until then, keep us in your prayers as we adjust to being a family of four!